Hai-hai, Oberoiyour aim is so much lower than your grasp. Chinese junk, my companions translation of the name, turns out to be curiously apt. The window dressing is exquisite, as befits the outrageous expenditure of the hotels refurbishmentliterally (white-embroidered chinoiserie-inflected blinds) and figuratively. Michelin starred London chef Andrew Wong is advertised on the menu as mentor, though said menu feels awfully slapdash in hand. The upholstery is red and dragon-splashed. Urns and lacquer red accents add layers ofclich.Dishes seemingly aim to surprise, while obscuring their true shape, flavour, ingredients and origins on the page. Once you strip away the dramatic presentation and garnishes, you are left with mostly Chinjabi comfort food, masala maar ke, in odd juxtaposition to a few supposed British Chinese classics from Wongs own stable (this one he merely lends a name and not secrets to, we suspect). Seriously, the spice levels are mouth puckeringeven in the mild dishes like the sesame-dressed chicken, with the Thousand Chilli Chicken living up to its sole promise red heat. Portion sizes are small sharing plates, mostly threesomes, because lucky. Its the stuff family-friendly ribbings are made of, and you can tease one another for every posh-sounding choice that turns up a neighbourhood familiar in masquerade. The meal begins, alarmingly, with papad. The vaunted cumin lamb skewers are entirely serviceable kebabs. The all-show snow mushrooms and the Dai tomato soup are very hot, the latter painfully rasam-ish. The banana dessert turned out to be a chocolate egg devoid of fruit for all its on-table drama. Service is all over the place, rather than five-star attentive. The wait staff try to steer us away from the dish we ultimately liked best, because most guests do not fancy it, which says something of the clientele. Clearly, Delhi is lapping this circus up, either because they are steadfast Oberoi aficionados or because its that new place to be seen at. However, we advise moderationto you and the wielders of the chilli oil.